Monday, April 10, 2006

Ineligible Fags.

Cleo's 50 Most Eligible Bachelors is a scam.

Of all the guys who are featured in the list; half of them are NOT eligible, a quarter of them are NOT straight. And the rest are barely legal.

I mean seriously dudes, Malaysia running out of straight single men in their 20s-30s isit? Turned cannibal and feasted on each other's BRAINS? Left the country when the price of petrol went up?

Or are you fuckers just being typical lazy fucks and not doing your job properly?

Fine. Ineligible fairies I can take. As long as they're hot, you know? At least give us SOMETHING to drool over and... stuff. That's the whole point of the list anyway, right?

It's a girl's magazine for fuck sakes of COURSE it's going be shallow of COURSE it's going to be full of shit of COURSE it's meant for entertaining of COURSE we're going to expect SOME form of sex...... I mean eye candy. Eye candy. Freudian slip. Really.

I can count the number of eye candies in that list with ONE hand.

I absolutely can NOT accept that some of the guys on the list are prettier looking than I am. Shit.

This is quite seriously and quite frankly, wtfing, mates.

I want my RM5.60 back you cheating lying scoundrels.


*casts Level 15 sorceress fireball on Cleo*


5
Screw you, Cleo.

Related:
Bash The Bachelors.
Short One - Bachelor Bash Update.
The Cleo Bachelor Bash (Picture Heavy Post)

68 comments:

  1. ahahaha. that pic is really cute.

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  2. i agree. the picks have gotten worse! =P i didn't even find ONE eye candy!

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  3. Eligible doesn't always = eye candy
    Usually some reason why we're still eligible.
    (ie: look funny, talk funny, smell funny, serial killer or all of the above)

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  4. all their answers also damn bodoh wan. like... oi, no imagination wan ar? haha

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  5. lol. That's right. Burn them all! Burn them at the stake!

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  6. just a blog hopper. ya how cool can your pic be =D

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  7. Haha.. Fireangel, your picture is so cute. Can I pinch your cheeks? See you on the 22nd!! BTW, I got a question to ask you, so remember this name. TAN YEE HOU

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  8. I've know some good lookin men, and the type of men who can't possibly have justice done to how eligible they are through a photo....and yknow. they ALL looked like crap in Cleo - but the photos this time round aren't as bad as they can be.

    but yeah. most of them aren't eligible, and...uh...more than a quarter...arent straight :P Though who said it was for the ladies only?

    i think they should just treat it as what it is - a beauty contest. who cares about eligibility? or personality? just find the ones that look good, stick an awesome sexy photo of them, and let the votes begin.

    FA: Yeah but the whole point is eye candy right? Have you seen this year's list yet? Euw. I hope it's just the cameraman being a retard.

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  9. That won't work. Here, use this Level 37 Meteor instead, jacked up with Level 12 Fire Mastery 8-)

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  10. I know a few people on that list in real life, and I have to say that they're MUCH hotter than the photos. Screw the Cleo cameraman instead!! Actually...screw the bachelors...Mmmmm...

    FA: Actually, I have to agree with you. Some of them ARE hot in real life. Fire the goddamn incompetent monkey behind the camera damnit!

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  11. I skipped all the text and went straight to the photo. Looking hot as usual. :) Now let me go back and read what your post is all about. lol. :P

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  12. #33 looks alright tho. I like him. :P

    FA: So's the boy on the front cover. He's pretty damn CUTE IT'S ALMOST ILLEGAL! Argh. Am not a craddle snatcher. Am not am not am not.

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  13. wtf you have a huge saw at home!?!?!?!

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  14. Do your own bachelor of the year FA. Grab photo's of all the hottest and most eligible male bloggers you know (or just 50 ugly guys you pulled off the street), and post them up here. I want to see FA's 50 most eligable Male Bloggers of the Year. :-)

    And if the fireball, meteor etc don't work on Cleo, then use a Level One Dabido Comment. :-)

    FA: OMFG. A short comment! By you! I'm buying numbers.

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  15. Cleo can't show HOT picture. Otherwise all ugly looking politicians will be voted out by villager next elections ;) .

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  16. !!! first time ever seeing a chainsaw as a blog prop!!

    Not enough variety of men in the mags. Should be more muhibah.
    Malay, chinese, indian, lain-lain, gweilo, malay, chinese, indian, lain-lain, gweilo..*repeat*

    they should cater to a wider range of taste

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  17. The background is within ur confined 4 wall space house?

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  18. hm. Maybe another photo with a screwdriver stabbing cleo is necessary to properly demonstrate "Screw You, Cleo".

    FA: Yeah. But a hacksaw is more ass kicking. I wished I had a chainsaw though. And a ski mask. It would really get the point across.

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  19. (HAHAHAHA at the dabido thing)

    It's the photos they take lah. seriously, the good looking guys always look not as good in the magazine.

    FA: I don't disagree. Last year I had a acquaintance on the list.. he's so damn good looking in real life.. but turn out looking like some ah beng in the mag. Damn wasted. Dumbass bitches at Cleo not doing their shit right.

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  20. ...and I reiterate here, you look WAY too comfortable with that hacksaw.

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  21. hope you didn't saw thru that nice looking table as well while you were tearing apart that copy of CLEO.

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  22. LOL, you have the look of determination like Tom pouncing on Jerry. And yeah, Dabido's comment makes sense. Go on and do the list of FA's bachelors!

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  23. u should drink lots of vodka and read it in a dimmed lit area, trust me, they will look better...

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  24. er.. sorry to double post but I want to point out that I'm not checking out the elegible bachelors... >_

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  25. you were not checking out the elEgible bachelors, I am sure.

    But were you checking out the elIgible bachelors? hmm..

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  26. Ya lor... Actually I think more than half of them are gays. Like, I have this feeling the Cleo people actually found and scouted for them at Blue Boy, Liquid and Musicteque (gay bars lor).

    Like every year it's like that to the point I thought you Malaysian girls are so bodoh. Yes, this is a scam.

    Hell, if I'm straight and cute, you think I'll still be single, meh? Come on!

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  27. The Lecherous MonkApril 11, 2006 at 12:08 AM

    One word.

    Fierce.

    Two words.

    I like.

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  28. Hahah definitely a most cute pic!

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  29. Yes yes, i thought i was the only one who thought that!

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  30. Oh FA, I write lots of short comments everywhere. In fact, on your last post (Whatder?) I only wrote three lines.

    Maybe I should just write long ones from now on so peopel won't ahve heart attacks.

    [Besides, poor Viewtru got the long ones in the last few days!] :-)

    At least you read one of my comments for once! ;-)

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  31. Nice blog. I should drop by more often.

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  32. Yeah man! just yesterday i was looking through their pics... very disappointing. even though SOME of them may look better real life... i bet the SOME would be like... 3 out of 50. haha...

    and i like your pic too. your hair looks damn nice. hahaha...

    FA: I hope my hair isn't the only thing about me......

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  33. I went for the preview at KLCC last Saturday.

    Man, I dunno about you, but there were quite a few who were SIZZLIN'!

    Some of them who looked hot in the mag didn't look too good in real life tho.

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  34. Of course it's a eye-candy pictures/dudes. That's why I am not into Cleo-girls because I am definitely not one of those in those pages. Can't blame them because at the end of the day, Iggy Pop will be the last picture that come into their mind if they run out of pictures. (No, I don't look like Iggy Pop ok...)

    Erm... that's not screwing. With a hack saw it's something else.

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  35. lol I like your photo. I reckon you look rather yummy in it. ^^ Is the oversized hacksaw a permanent fixture or can I have you without it?

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  36. love it when u r in anger or frustrated....love the pic

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  37. i think u look eligible, FA. I wonder why they dun use u for their shoot.

    FA: Do I look like a man to you? DO I?

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  38. HeartBreakKid: Does she look like a bachelor to you? Or do you know something we don't and she had us fooled all along? :P

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  39. Well I DO know who is eligible...

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  40. Tell you what... you truely need a man... you don't even know how to hold a saw right!

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  41. nombor sembilan belas ialah coursemate aku.

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  42. i SO TOTALLy agree wit u...
    can u imagine how my jaw dropped when i saw tat there's actually a 40 year-old fag in the list?
    the nerve of them...
    shit... n oso there's a guy who looks SO MUCH like a horse...
    i dun understand y dey giv out those awards to ppl who r so unfit for it...

    it's ALL crap!!!!


    but i'm still buyin it for the beauty tips n celeb gossips, duh...

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  43. Eligible doesn't mean eligible for women what. Gay = OK. But you're right, most of the time they're pretty fugly and that's inexcusable.

    Then again if so gorgeous not bachelor already lar.

    FA: OF COURSE MUST BE FOR WOMEN LAH. IT's IN A GIRLY MAGAZINE OKAY!!!!!!1111111111Cheebaikia. I also single loh. You insinuating something is it huh? Huh? HUH?

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  44. err.. where did you get those saw? I only used it once in living memory to cut down a tree.. hehehe

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  45. This is an outrage! I demand for Cleo to have Cleo's 50 most eligible Bachelorettes next year onwards!! And you damn well must be in the list! It wouldn't just be eye candy, it'd be a fucking feast (pun very much intended)!

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  46. re petrina: of course it's not only your hair.
    anytime you need clarification on that, call chen - she's waxin lyrical about your beauties right now.

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  47. so stupid hoh?? deteoriating like shit.

    i only thought ben ibrahim was like the only ONE eye-candy. the rest all can go fly kites..

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  48. Kitten - Of course Cleo won't have a 'Cleo's 50 most eligible Bachelorettes', that's what MENS magazines or Lesbian magazines are for!

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  49. You never fail to amaze...

    Cheers!!!

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  50. You are so right! Some of the guys are utterly minging!

    paul

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  51. hey 2 of my friends r in there u know :P

    FA: Ditto. Doesn't mean that the rest isn't crap. :P

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  52. nice blog.. i like the color.. but this blog is host by word press?

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  53. i've stopped giving a h00t after the 2nd year.

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  54. Strange no one says anything when the bikini issue of Sports Ilustrated comes out...hehehe!
    :)

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  55. Those guys are total crap... it'll be diff if I'm there...
    But I've to get my Imperforate anus fixed...

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  56. Looks with brains? Nah, you'll never gonna find that! God is fair.

    FA: If that's the case then THANK goodness I don't have the looks.

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  57. looks like FA got a haircut...either way so gorgeous...

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  58. Yes dear we can camwhore later tonight. ;)

    And yes Cleo Bachelors are shit. Except a few cos they're friends so cannot bitch. Booooo.... Singapore ones are always the bomb. Yes gays should be banned from Cleo Bachelor list. Underage too. Oh especially the ugly ones at the back of the page will be getting ugly babies.

    Ta! ;)

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  59. u know, i will b 2 happy if only, any 1 of them reply my email, but no!!!!

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  60. Woah there Girl, I can see the fire in you eyes there. The 50 guys arent all that bad. Just to get one fact absolutely right about your opinion...I for one AM definitley one of the straight single men in their 20s-30s. I just won't be the voted the best and 'crowned' bachelor of the year of course, BUT, It's been a fun experience and at least I got the cool gifts from the sponsors ;-)

    Come by the Zouk event with your fellow bloggers on the 28th and you can personally bitch slap some of the guys! I think they'll like it :-) I hope you'll join me for a drink though, cos Vodka is my favorite spirit too.

    Cool blog.

    Bachelor #3.

    FA: Is that a proposal? Where are my VIP invites then? :P

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  61. FA with a dolled up look like yours, who needs VIP passes?
    If you confirm with me you'll be on the guest list.

    And yes, it certainly is a proposal :-)

    P.S. RE your post "Mini Meet. Mini Update" Your butchered hair isn't bad at all! You're still Angelically attractive.
    The bright side is it'll grow and also I hear wigs at Scarlets' are going half price ;-)

    FA: Oh. my. god. Is that a Rugrats' reference?!?!?!?

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  62. [...] I mean damnit, we want answers. THIS is probably the best AND only opportunity to find out for yourself whether or not the bachelors are mostly gay or married bastards. Or married gay bastards. [...]

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  63. [...] Related: Ineligible Fags Bash The Bachelors. Short One - Bachelor Bash Update. [...]

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  64. [...] Related: Ineligible Fags The Cleo Bachelor Bash (LOTS of pictures) Bash The Bachelors. [...]

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  65. Dudette, since when your hair became so nice and long? I remember the last time I saw your hair they were kinda ... untidy?

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