Wednesday, December 3, 2008



Oh god. Not another teen something or other story.
Oh, it's a love story of a tortures 400 teen vampire is it?
How fucking original.
My RL Stine phase was like 20 years ago lah.

I told myself I would never ever ever read the damn book.
But now I find myself watching the damn movie.
Nonononono!!!!! I didn't pay to watch this I swear it was free!
(Thanks DavidLian & Suanie!!!)

Seriously, what is up with the lead actor? He is FUGLY.
I couldn't get over how bloody ugly he was.
He is so fugly he makes fugly people look like contestants in a beauty pageant.
He is so fugly, there is no word in the english language that even describes his whole new type of ugly.
Ugly as ass.
Worse than ass.
Ugly as warts on a toad.
No, uglier.
Uglier than a thousand buckets of alien vomit after a hardcore drunken night out on alien booze.
No, uglier than THAT.
He looks like a corpse that's been dead for a hundred years.
Oh wait, that's the point right?
Argh, you get my point.
He is just UGLY.

And it's not as if he had any on screen charisma.
Fucker walks like his balls are as big as a durian.
Or has durian for balls.
Which explains why he had to kangkang so besar besar... scared the legs terkena the thorns from his balls.

Mygod, Robert Pattinson fans are so kinda burn me on a stake for this.
Sorry ar, one girl's meat another girl's sewage lah.
Feel free to make fun of the men I think are hot.
... like Peter Facinelli and Cam Gigandet... oooooh.

Oh what about the movie ar? Well, I went in knowing that it's going to be some cheesy, juvenile harry potter version of a vampire movie so you could say that I went in with negative expectations.

But at the end of the day, I find myself not hating this movie.

I can't believe it either.

Despite the plastic acting, corny lines, the fugly lead actor, even the 2 minute cheesy scenes from the karaoke mtv clip flashback moment.

I didn't hate it. :(

Ashamed and speechless? Me too.

Maybe I didn't hate it because it was free? Probably.
But how do you explain the fact that I actually WANT to read the book now? HUH HUH?
I've got no explanations for that. :(

Sigh. Next thing you know I'm wanting to watch The Disaster Movie.
Should that ever happens please feel free to stab me in the chest with the nearest sharp instrument you can find.


  1. The movie is actually not bad. It didn't waste time with special effects, and because it didn't have any of those, they must make up for it elsewhere, and I was quite impressed with the script.

    It's not a below average movie though. I actually enjoyed it.

  2. I guess y'all saw a different movie than I did. The best part was the vampires playing baseball. Other than that, I would not even recommend renting it.

  3. well, i'm a big twihard but i have to agree with u lah on rob pattinson. he's not the hottest guy out there and he sucks as an actor. tho initially i wanted to say fak u when u kutuk the guy like shit but hey, u haf ur own opinion n i have mine. now go read the damn book lol best teen angsty shit eva!

  4. I can't even remember what happened in the movie now. it was THAT forgettable. haha.

    I think you're gonna get more hate mail than I am. LOL

  5. man, that baseball scene.

    oh and also..

    "and so the lion fell in love with the lamb"
    "what a stupid lamb"
    "what a sick, masochistic lion.."


  6. dude wtf is up with your bigass heineken ad in the background? 0_o

    twilight is such a trashy read, makes you wanna turn and turn the pages to see what happens next even though you already kinda see the cliches coming. :P oh the shaaaame

  7. yeah tell me about it!
    this is the kind of story everyone will secretly like, but never admit to it! I was so embarrassed that I actually enjoyed reading the book so much..and I liked the movie too but now I'm telling people that it's 'cheesy and corny' cos I'm afraid they'll laugh at me for enjoying it...

    I mean, 'grown-ups' aren't supposed to like such things, right? right? =P

  8. Twilight is re-fucking-tarded. Now, Robert Pattinson aint the finest guy out there but I still think he alright even though I can't understand for the shits of me why the hell anyone is actually liking this bullshit mediocre attempt at a novel disgrace of all literary works to ever exist. Ooh, Bella retarded ass reads Austen, how smart is she? Not quite! Read some mother fucking Thomas Hardy, bitch or some Alice Walker! You think I give 2 shits about Pride and Prejudice, one of the worlds most overrated and overadapted "love" stories to ever exist? Fuck it. My grilled cheese sandwich is done and I'm finna go eat. Peace!!!

  9. eh. why all ur post always complain2 abt this and that????? Happen to stumble upon ur blog, and after reading few post, i find myself like so depressed okay. I thought it was ok at first, after few posts it gets annoying ok. This is just Singapore you already complain like hell. What more to say if you go to the states or Moon. I think sure die one.

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