Overheard on Hitz.fm this morning.
Would you trust your partner with an ex?
The honest truth?
(Edited: Okay so I got a little bit emotional and wrote a freaking thesis on this. Then I decided to cut it up. And now I'm putting up the truncated version up again. What a fickle-minded bitch!)
It's because I can't handle it. I'm a typical female. I overanalyse everything. I let my mind wander so deep into things that it upsets me. Without a doubt, I'll lose all control and obsess about their history. How she was. Was it good. Who does he love more. What did they do together? Is he doing that with me now? Who does he treat better. Did he wished for things turn out differently. Is he over her. Is he telling the truth. Does he think she was hotter? Does he still think of her fondly. Why me. Why her. Why now. Why this. Why How What When Where. Questions questions and more questions. It'll NEVER end.
Will I ever let them meet?
I'll never be 100% OKAY with my partner meeting the ex. Especially alone. Especially for "drinks".
Seriously, if they are so fond of each other, are still so close, have so much to talk about and whatevercock reason they may to meet - why the hell break up in the first place? What? 6 billion people on this piece of rock and he can't find anymore friends to make and keep? Fuck that.
How can it not be weird? Him and the ex had all sorts of history together. The emotions. The feelings. The intimacy, especially the physical intimacy. How can it be bloody normal for ex couples to have a normal platonic friendship after every sick thing they've gone through? HOW CAN IT NOT BE WEIRD? HELLO? They've done (and wanted to do) and seen all sorts of private dirty shit with each other and now they're just gonna PRETEND like it never happened and act like the ex is a dear sibling? Riiigggghhhhtttt.
They were together and they fucked it up. So move on with their fucking lives already lah. Why the hell are they still trying to "keep in touch" and play the "oh we're good friends" card? Having even their desire to want to keep in touch with their ex makes me feel inferior. I hate feeling inferior. What? I'm not good enough for you to let go of your past now is it? Want to have your cake and eat it too? Bollocks!
But to answer the question - Yes, they may meet. If he has nothing to hide then just bring me along. I'll try to tolerate their existence and pretend to be nice to everybody. But he sure as hell better not blame me if I'm going to be cold towards him afterwards, and then if I mean something to him, he better damn make sure he pampers me like fuck for the next few days so I'll never forget who's first in his goddamn life. Hey, I dealt with his bloody haha-ing with his ex. He deals with the aftermath. Case closed. Simple right?
Ultimately, I guess I can take the odd hi, how's it going, bye. Just definitely not the "hey we're bffs now so we meet everyday for lunch and exchange SEX tips!!11oneone". In the end, it all depends on how secure I am with the partner in that relationship, and how comfortable I am with that ex.
I don't think it's just me. I'm sure there are plenty of girls AND guys who feel the same way too, to a certain extent. Everybody has their flaws, and this is but one of my many. So no. I don't tell me to deal with it.
Would YOU trust your partner with an ex? Why?