Wednesday, December 5, 2007

My Mini Reviews.

Copying Eyeris's style of not a review review, but not quite. My review's format is going to be more like "spit everything out from my head right at the moment I'm typing it" sort. Short and sweet posts are good right? Yes, and so are updates.

I have read the book and I kinda liked it. I have watched the movie and I liked it even MORE than the book! Movie was not exactly like the book, but it is so damn adorable you'll leave the theatre (only after the movie of course) with a goofy smile on your face and a warm feeling in your tummy. The cast was right, the scenes were right, the lines were right, the storytelling was right. The lead guy was damn lovable in a puppy-eyed sort of way. I did feel that somebody a bit more ethereal than Claire Danes should take her role, but I can't think of any names. Definitely NOT Kirsten Dunst, though. And Cate Blanchett's too old. Somebody younger. Easily one of my favourite movie of the year (tied top spot with 300!). It didn't try too hard to tell you a story, it just TOLD you the story - something which a lot of movies these days try too hard to do but just can't seem to get it right. Stardust got it just right.

Lead character looks cool until he starts to speak. The way he lifelessly stares into the screen, right at me, as he swiftly disembowels yet another victim just makes me want to take him home and.... I can't freaking believe he was that floppy wristed disjointed hipped gay bad guy from Die Hard 4.0. Until he opens his yap, then try as hard as I can I just could NOT forget that he IS that floppy wristed disjointed hipped gay bad guy from Die Hard 4.0, which totally loses that bad-boy-sex-appeal. The girl is kind of goth hot but is totally pointless and is only there to spice it up with some sex, which we can see NONE of. Nobody can act for shit.The script murders IQ. The plot was... WHAT PLOT? Save money, play the damn game. Don't bother watching it.

I'm not even going to catch Beowulf - because watching fake Angelina Jolie on screen just doesn't it do it for me. But I might try to catch the Enchanted - because somebody told me that *I* would like it. Apparently this somebody reads my blog and KNOW that I'm an ANGRY, BITTER baby eating machine and YET this person thinks I might like it. If he is wrong, his first newborn I shall consume. You know who you are, so be afraid, because I KNOW where you live. Muahahahahaha!


  1. Enchanted IS funny. :) not slapstick funny, but funny funny coz they have combined all the Disney Princesses into 1 person. If you like Patrick Dempsey (sigh... McDreamy.... *swoon*), you should definitely go watch! *swooning*

    Stardust is indeed superb. So great is the movie that i ended up watching it 3 times! :-D i love their witty lines!

    FA: Unfortunately don't like Dempsey and absolutely can NOT stand Grey's Anatomy. It gives me this uncontrollable urge to slap everybody in it, and I'll only end up hurting my hands from whacking the tv screen so much. I'm more the ER and House sort of person. But yes, I will catch Enchanted.... but only after a couple of swigs.... just in case. :)

  2. Yaloh, he's like so homosexulle dickless in Die Hard.. I wrote my die hard review here:

  3. 300 is also your top movie of the year? @.@

    I thought it was only a meat fest.

    FA: YUP! Actually I liked Die Hard too, hmm.

  4. oi! my Movie Not-Reviews are a trademark, ok? hehehe. Lucky I just posted a new one. hehehe

  5. dont bother with beowulf dear...waste of time..death at a funeral and american ganster on the hand were quite gud...dats if it makes it to malaysian cinema's..:)

  6. Aha! I've finally found someone who agrees that Claire Danes isn't ethereal enough to be Yvainne...=) Similarly, I can't think of any other actress who could play that part!

  7. yeah, stardust made me feel warm and fuzzy inside.

    But I like Claire Danes ANYWAY...

  8. Stardust the book was waaaay better. Movie was too... Hollywood.

  9. To me... Enchanted was MUCH better than Stardust.
    Beowulf was actually kind of okay too. And Angeline only appears for like 10minutes in total. hahhaa...

  10. beowulf sucks big big time ....if a movie sounds like a b movie... it's a b-movie.. :)

  11. Yes beowulf ain't worth watching. Enchanted's ok, funny enough and the golden compass is straining to cramp a novel into 2 hours. Not everyone can do an LOTR as well sadly..

  12. Anyone who has grown up on - and enjoyed - the old Disney movies will BLOODY LOVE Enchanted. You are welcome to my firstborn and any subsequent offspring if this is not true for you.


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