I stole my sister's old brick of a phone to use as a temporary replacement until I bothered to get myself a spanking new one, because, well, my old spanking new phone got stolen before.
The monster couldn't even fit in my bag properly.
But after three months of crying myself to sleep at night and throwing bricks heavenward while listening to emo songs I finally got my shit back together and got around to getting me a new phone. It's pretty damn sweet. Okay I lied. It's freaking sexy and if it was a human I would jump it, rip its clothes of and... uh.... have tea with it.
Hello Sony Ericsson w810i.
Being a Nokiahead I'm sure I've said that I would never get anything BUT a NOkia EVAR.
Well, I lied.
I mean, I still really do want to get one of them cool N series with the sweet 3G but right now it's a little too bulky and a little too FUCKING EXPENSIVE. DAMN YOU NOKIA. WHY MUST YOU MAKE IT SO HARD ON ME. WHY?!?!?!
Strictly for comparative purposes only.
Anyway. MY w810i is sweeter than yours because it's totally like, white. WHITE okay. THE SYMBOL OF PURITY. INNOCENCE. STERILISATION. FEMINITY. PEACE DOVES.
Totally better than your boring mundane it's-not-even-a-colour-but-an-empty-space black.
What I really LIKE about this phone is that
1. It is ridiculously sexy tiny. (3250 was as bulky as a brick)
2. It is ridiculously sexy light. (3250 was as heavy as a brick)
3. It has a ridiculous night light. (3250 doesn't have any of that shit)
4. the camera is orgasmic. (3250's camera.. huh what camera)
5. Big big screen - all the more better for me to check out.... videos.
It even came with some really gay Lee Hom images and video - which I'm sure is only available for the ASIAN phone markets. Angmoh people won't even know who the flying fuck this gay looking chink is. I mean, I'm like, Lee Hom's GREATEST FAN EVER and I REALLY WANT TO HAVE HIS BABIES, but lately he's been gayin' it up a little too much for my liking.
Took some test shots with the 2MP camera function and since I readily admit that I'm a chronic can-not-be-saved-doomed-to-an-eternity-in-hell-camwhore and have a big generous heart, I willingly sacrificed myself (and your eyes) for the greater good of this little camera test.
Pictures are not edited to correct lighting or sharpness or whatever you photoshoppers usually do to make your pictures appear prettier. I am testing the greatness of my camera here, not to showcase my lack of hotness etcetc... But I did collage it, which wouldn't effect the quality of the photos whatsoever.
Daylight, without flash:
Night, with flash:
Almost as good as a REAL CAMERA OMG. I must admit that the camera function is WAYYYYYYyyyyyyyyyyyy better than my old new freaking Nokia 3250's where the pictures turn out as grainy as hell and at a certain distance, comes out distorted and off-coloured. Nokia 3250 takes absolutely SHITTY night pictures, and the "night mode" doesn't help much. SE one has flash, which pwns the Nokia's camera function upside down and makes it its bitch. What a hoe.
What I really DISLIKE about this phone is:
1. It's not as user friendly as any Nokia phone I've ever used. It's lacking so many little things I've always taken for granted with a Nokia. Maybe I'm just biased. Maybe I'm just too used to NOkia. Maybe the SE is just gay.
2. The in two built games are pathetic. One of them which I bothered trying was a gayed up version of the classic tetris which my 14 year old sister LOVE to bits, but she's 14 years old, and she worships Rihanna... so.. trust her taste? No.
3. The Walkman function is also a little gay.
4. THe Radio dunction is very prone to white noise.
5. AND MOST OF ALL [commence rant]
I FUCKING HATE THE SMS FUNCTION WITH A VENGEANCE. HOW CAN THEY WHAT THE HELL. THIS IS AN OUTRAGE! Look, I am very anal with my SMS function, as I abuse it to BITS. The average 400-500 smses a MONTH is a good indication of how FREAKING important SMSing is to me. So, no do NOT give me that crap about how it takes getting USED to BECAUSE IT TAKES MORE than the patience of a SAINT to fucking get used to it. I'll get used to it when I DIE maybe, because that's probably how LONG it'll take ME to get use to it.
First of all, the fucking keypads are so HARD even elephants would have problem trying to fucking key anything with their super duper elephant strength. I have to deliberately and forcefully hit every. single. key pad right smack in the center of it before the software can recognise the freaking letter. If I go too fast sometimes it misses the letter. If I go too slow, it just drives me MAD HULKSMASH. YEARGHHHHHHHHH!!!!11111one.
Secondly the "SPACE" button is NOT on the "0" keypad, but ON THE "#" keypad so that COMPLETELY FUCKS up my smsing rhythm (I do it without T9 because T9 is for faggots), which results in me having to ERASE A LOT which THEN leads to another PAIN IN THE ASS.
The FUCKING Erase button which is typically the "C" is NOW on the RIGHT side, NOT the left side which is normally where the "C" button was on ALL my freaking NOkias. Now the left side is saved for the almighty "Go Backwards" button so everytime I fuck up a letter (which is FUCKING OFTEN NOW WITH THESE RIDICULOUSLY UNFRIENDLY KEYPADS AS SENSITIVE AS SANDSTONES) my left thumb would instinctively press on the "Go Backwards" where it would take me to completely DIFFERENT window and my sms message would go byebye and BE GONE. Forever! Rinse! Repeat! Until I feel like smashing the fucking contraption with a sledgehammer then use the sledgehammer to smash MY head in to get rid of the stupid HEADACHE from trying to SMS. ARGH!!! INFURIATING^INFINITY!
WHY DOES IT FREAKING NEED THE "GO FUCKING BACK" BUTTON??? IT IS SO FUCKING REDUNDANT! THE "C" IS GOOD ENOUGH FOR EVERYTHING. EVERYTHING! GO BACKWARDS. CANCEL. DELETE. ERASE. EVERYTHING! OKAY! I MEAN WHO HASN'T BEEN A FREAKING NOKIA USER BEFORE?!?! EVERYBODY AT ONE POINT OF TIME HAS BEEN A NOKIA USER! SO STICK WITH WHAT WORKS! WHY FIX SOMETHING WHEN IT ISN'T BROKEN STUPID FUCKED UP TRY HARD I WANT TO BE DIFFERENT FROM THATOTHER PHONE BRAND NO MATTER WHAT IT TAKES EVEN IF IT MEANS SACRIFICING THE USER FRIENDLINESS OF PHONE BECAUSE WHO GIVES A FUCK ABOUT USERS THEY'LL JUST BUY ANYTHING WE SHIT OUT TO THEIR FACES ANYWAY ARRRRGGGHhhhh!!!!
Oh god. I have a headache now.
Funny thing was, I did have a go with the keypads on a friend's similar model. I thought it was alright then, but I forgot about testing it for SMSing.... hahaha... totally asking for it. What a dumbass. Sigh.
Despite my over the top bitchings about that bit, I still like my phone though. It's still pretty fucken sweet. I only bitch about things I'm fond off. It's when I'm indifferent about it, that's when it should be shitting steel.