Legally Stoned.

So I've been pretty damn ill since last, LAST Monday.

It started with a sorethroat.

Which mutated into a cold/flu.

Which mutated into one day fever.

Which mutated into a cough.

Which hasn't gone away yet.

Have been downing meds like a proper pill-popping pharmaceutical dependant junkie I have every potential to be due to my inability to delay self gratification but that's a story for another day.

Anyway.

This is Cough-En.



Cough-En has been my night time buddy for about ... oh 2 weeks now.

Walked into the pharmacy one day and bought 2 bottles on the spot. Had to jot down my IC and other personal details, because apperently it messes with your CNS. But who cares about that when it gives me the best black sleep I've ever had! Nervous System? Bah! Perfect working brains and spinal chords are for PUSSIES.

Just 10ml of that sucker is enough to knock me out within 15 minutes.

And like all cough mixtures, this one also tastes like shit, with a slight hint of blackcurrant. I can't for the life of me, understand why some people can tell me this tastes SWEET. As sweet as GALL probably, euw. Damn you god why must you curse me with such heightened bitter taste buds.

I can't say if Cough-En has made my cough any better, but it hasn't made it any worse. So until I've stop coughing, I'm downing 10 mls of this fucker every night, because hell, it's perfect for the coughing insomniac.

PLUS!

It's not only FOR COUGH, it's also great for runny noses, sneezing, stuffy nose, and itchy, watery red eyes.

Holy shit! That's me right there! I have the most sensitive nose and my eyes get watery like I'm cutting onions at the slightest contact of dust! This is like a MIRACLE in a BOTTLE! I'm gonna be dependant on this stuff for the rest of my life! Ok. Kidding. Seriously.

I've already finished one bottle though.

*bUrP*



Check out the ingredients - see if any of you smart jokers can figure out which is the poison that does all the magic. I don't advice you to take this stuff if you're a kid, pregnant, or handling heavy machinery... like trains, tractors and computers. This is some serious "will mess you up and make you irritable drowsy damn lazy to layan people" stuff.

For example, last night, as I was drifting off into comatose mode, I recieved a couple of phone calls, which realllllllllly irritated the shit out of me. The body refused to react to it, and yet at the same time, it wanted the freaking vibrations to just STOP so I could pass out in PEACE. I picked up one phone call from a girlfriend. Mumbled something about needing to pass out, then proceeded to pass out. This morning when I woke up, I wasn't sure if I dreamt about the call or if it was real. I don't even remember what she said, and what I said to her in reply. THIS is how strong this shit is. It's almost like being drunk and light headed from too much liquour without the hangover the next day.

I'm pretty sure prolong intake of this juice is bad for you. It works overtime and I'm still feeling zombie-fied the next day. Mind you, I only take this stuff ONCE a day, and only AT NIGHT. I know some people who take this stuff 3 times a day - and nothing ever happens to them. But I suppose if you're already a hardcore alcoholic or a junkie with a fucked up liver and CNS, this stuff ain't gonna be working for you anyway. So no refunds from me.

But for chrissakes you freaks DON'T GO ABUSING THIS SHIT WEI. Abusing is bad. Bad. BAD. Don't lah try to be some superterror champion and down the whole bottle just because you think you can and then cry your lungs out when you end up in the hospital with half of your brains leaking out from your ears because no one else is going to be responsible for your own stupidity except yourself. And perhaps your parents. Who should be neutered. For the good of mankind.

And this concludes my community service for the week! So, bye!